SL Fashion Police

It’s October and all over the internets people are going pink to show their support for The Cause

Naturally, we’re seeing an influx in avatars supporting the cause in their own ways….

While we fully support and love Boobies….we’d prefer it if you didn’t apply the “Go big or go home” to them…. good lord woman, you’re gonna poke someone’s Face out!!

Tonight’s runner up in the Wet and Wild T-shirt competition:

They nearly lost 2 contestants and a judge to that medusa like mane. Yetch.

First, The Good News – My computer is almost back to normal….AND…. HOMME is Back too!!

Join us at none other then Seven Ultra Lounge, cause we know you love it as much as we do , tomorrow starting at 6pm SLT for their Re-Launch Party! Be sure you “Dress to Impress”

Now, The Bad News…. The grid is in total disarray!

I turn my back for a couple of weeks… okay, Months… and the station phones are ringing off the hook! Reports are pouring in and I gotta say… it’s NOT Pretty!

With the state of the economy we understand that some of you may have no other choice but to take on some part time work, and what better way to earn some quick cash then prostitution, right? Wrong!! If your face looks like you just fell off the back of a Mac truck, all the SLexing in SL isn’t gonna earn you a dime. Please do yourself a favor and find a much, much darker corner to slang your ass.

Thrift Shoppes and bargain basements can be a great alternative when you’re on a budget, but if your boobs are saggin this bad, we’re gonna have to ask that you forgo the halter tops…especially the extremely unsupportive ones made out of Gramma’s afghan! Are those really boots or did she swipe a couple of traffic cones to complete this look? Yetch.

And lastly….Designers, a plea to you…Please stop forcing your models to cram their feet into shoes 3 sizes too small!  Is it not enough sufferage for them to live on a diet of cigarettes and prim-fast bars?

That’s all I got folks. I hope these lessons serve you well!!

Until next time….

Officer D. Rockin

Lately we`ve seen a major crime wave on the grid, and the victim is always the same: the ass.  Today, I am focusing on Seven Ultra Lounge,where most of the patrons look pretty good, but sometimes an offender slips through, and of course, the SL Fashion Police is there to make the apprehension!

Now, this poor unfortunate soul’s pants appear to have been eaten by her ass, leaving her undies exposed, and it appears her belt is next on the menu.  Now, lest there be confusion, I am not mocking her ass, I’m sure it’s perfectly adequate and she doesn’t fall over when she sits or anything.  But feed it, before it starts snacking on your clothes!

This dancer getting her groove on must’ve gotten dressed in the dark, because she is missing a very important part of her look:  pants!  Or a skirt, anything, something!  I’m all for looking sexy and cute, but there is a line and that line is: no one should be able to give you a gynocological exam at the club! (Unless you’re in the bathroom, and ermm…yeah)

Today’s report has been brought to you by the Society for the Advocation of Pants.

~Sgt. Phoenix

The Seven Ultra Lounge is the Newest, Hottest, Sexiest club to hit SL. I had to bribe the door man to let me in, noob, but it was well worth the$L!!

Here are a few hot shots from the event:

Colleen – looking fab and  shakin it like nobody else can

Moi

Our very own Phoenix Chapman and the amazing Torrid Midnight

Callie Cline  & Bianca Darling in the background providing the tunes.

Give it up for the most popular outfit of the evening…. It’s not THAT Bad, just not my style.

Not to mention everyone else was wearing it too!

And now it’s time for our most prestigious award of the night:

What is with those gloves? Thank Gawd She wasn’t Blinging, but of course a Posh club like this would never had allowed her in, cause that would be total overload.

Back in Action,

~Officer D. Rockin

…Or so they say.

Well, We (me) here at SLFP are not quite sure if we are flattered or offended by the new “SL Fashion Disasters” blog “What the Fug?” located at wehatewhatyourewearing.blogspot.com.

The “Diva” in me is chomping at the bit to chew them up and spit them out for even thinking of producing a knock off blog and trying to pass themselves as Fashion Critiques…but then the smidge of level headedness prevails and reminds me that I barely have time to keep up with the floods of fashion faux paus you all send our way and the more the merrier in the combat agains the restless crimes of fashion on the grid.

So bring it on ladies! I’ll be keeping an eye on you and looking for my “Hommage to SLFP” badge when you get your blog design completed

Subscribe to What the Fug? Here

The One, The Only,

Chief D. Rockin

Ladies,
Have you ever heard the expression “Why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free”? In today’s economy it’s tough enough to make a $L, but think of all the strippers and escorts you’re putting out of business by walking around with your Xcite bits out there for any old joe to cop a feel!

Ok, the least you could do is be some what accurate with the placement of your faux nipples… I mean come on! Saggy funbags do not make for perky nips.

Officer D. Rockin

Well, I thought I’d make my first post here a piccy that I’d snapped myself a while ago. This perp is breaking so many rules, I don’t think she’ll ever be eligable for parole! Lets examine Exhibit A:

The eyes are immediately drawn to the bling. I mean you’d have to be blind to miss it and if you got too close, you’d probably wind up losing your retinas. Some people think this looks good, however we at the SLFP know this isn’t the case. Secondly, lets look at the shape for a moment. Her boobs are separated by such a vast chasm that I’m sure I could probably park a bus in her cleavage. They look too flat too, which is rare in SL, so some credit to her for daring to be different Still on the body, her calves seem to have been grafted from a Russian shotputter and somehow don’t match with such dainty ankles and non-eventful thighs.

On the subject of thighs, anyone spot the gap in her bodyoil, which just happens to be outside her thong. I mean, thats two basic cautions right there. Failure to comprehend layers and wearing cheap, nasty bodyoil.

So, to sum up, this crim is sporting way too much bling, has boobs you could land a plane between, has calves that look like they were glued on and applies her body oil over her thong and likes to miss a bit on her thighs. Apparently, thats the next big thing.

I hand this one over to the jury for sentencing.

Officer A. Shinji.

Is it me or is this chick so greased up her tu-tu is sliding off?

These lovely ladies appear to be suffering from the residual effects of Pants off Dance off! We understand it’s the latest craze sweeping the grid, heck – I am personally a huge fan of the sport, but let this serve as a reminder to you all – it’s fine to let loose every once in a while and boogie with your but out, but please be sure to collect *all* your belongings before hitting the malls!

The best of the bunch, we’ll let her off with a warning.

Looks like this avvie is taking “Riding Bareback” to the extreme.

I think she’s just learned the hard way about the dangers of not wearing pants… or clothes in general – don’t let this happen to you!